The Dangers of Fanfiction
by Calenlass Greenleaf1
Summary: OLD. What if Legolas was addicted to reading fan fiction, and he convinces Aragorn, Elladan, and Elrohir to join him? Elrond and Thranduil are not amused. Very AU and not to be taken seriously. Written for April Fools' Day of 2007. No adult themes.


**Title:** The Dangers of Fanfiction

**Author:** Calenlass Greenleaf

**Disclaimer:** Aragorn, Legolas, Thranduil, Elrond, Elladan, and Elrohir belong to Tolkien. Only the plot belongs to me.

**Rating:** PG. No adult themes, violence, torture, or angst.

**Genre:** General/Humor

**Summary:** What if Legolas was addicted to reading fan fiction, and he convinces Aragorn, Elladan, and Elrohir to join him? Elrond and Thranduil are is not amused. Very AU—since when did computers exist in Valinor? Not to be taken seriously. An oneshot for April Fools' Day. I also wrote it to celebrate my first anniversary of being a Tolkienist.

**A/N:** Translations are at the bottom, as usual.

**A/N #2:** For those that are reading "Apostate's Ruse" and "Dark Times Approaching," relax. I will update those two fics as soon as I can.

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**The Dangers of Fanfiction**

"What are you reading?"

For the first time in many years, someone had been able sneak up on Legolas. The elf nearly bolted out of his chair, and hastily pressed a button. "Nothing," he said, looking nervously over his shoulder and back at the screen.

Aragorn snorted. "Really, Legolas?" He reached out one hand, and tried to attain the mouse. "Let me see, _mellon nîn_."

Reluctantly, Legolas pressed the return button. "Don't say anything," he warned.

As Aragorn leaned over to read, his eyes widened. "What?" he gasped. "How could-how could you be reading—"

"Fan fiction?" Legolas asked, closing the window and standing up. He shrugged. "It passes the time." He was taken aback by Aragorn's expression. "What?"

The man shook his head. "I can accept the fact you are using this…computer. But fan fiction?"

"There is nothing wrong with it—it simply a work of fiction!" The elf tried to defend himself. "And some of it is very good."

"And what about the bad?"

"I simply ignore them. Most writers are kind enough to provide warnings and the like." Legolas looked at his friend. "Have you ever read any of it?"

Aragorn found a chair. "Once," he replied shortly.

"What was it?"

"A horrible one." The man shuddered. "It was one of those—"

Legolas held up a hand, grimacing. "I don't want to hear it. Who was it about?"

Aragorn flushed as he answered, "Me. And you." He glared at the elf. "Now do you see why I hate it?"

The former prince of Mirkwood shook his head. "How would you like me to show you the finer points of fanfiction?"

The man looked at him warily. "What do you mean by ''finer points?"

"Not all the stories out there are bad, Estel." Legolas sat back down and opened a new window. For some time, he was silent, save for the sounds of clicking and typing. Somewhat curious, Aragorn walked over to see what Legolas was doing.

The elf stood up and offered his chair to the man. "There are two lists here," he said. "One is a list of complete stories, and the other is a list of incomplete stories." He moved his mouse and click on a story. "Start with this one."

Aragorn looked warily at Legolas. "Are you sure about this?"

Legolas chuckled as he walked away. "Trust me, Estel. I think you will like this one"

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Hours later, Elladan and Elrohir walked into the room. Both of them crept silently up behind Aragorn's chair and leaned over him. The man did not take any notice until Elrohir let out a gasp. "Estel!"

The man's reaction was remarkable; he gave a yelp, and nearly swung his right hand into Elladan's face as he turned around. "El?" he managed to say before his chair tipped over. Elrohir managed his brother before he fell. As quickly as his fingers would allow him, Aragorn closed the window. He grinned weakly at his brothers. "Um…hello?"

Elladan folded his arms. "What were you just reading?" Just outside the room, Legolas stopped to listen to the conversation. He was curious to find out what Aragorn would say.

Aragorn shrugged. "Nothing."

"That certainly was not nothing." Elrohir interjected, watching how quickly Aragorn's face was coloring. "It was fan fiction."

"So?" The man tapped his fingers on the desk. "Is there something wrong?" Legolas snickered. _Amazing how only a few hours ago, you were as vehement as the twins,_ he thought as he slipped into the back of the room, unnoticed.

"Wrong?" Elrohir's eyes widened. "That-that whole world is wrong!"

"It is not!" Aragorn retorted. He quickly opened a window. "Read this, and you'll see what I mean."

With skeptical expression on their faces, the twins pulled up chairs to the desk, and began reading.

Legolas fought the urge to laugh as he watched the three of them crowded around the computer, fully absorbed. He sighed as he left the room. _They've stolen my computer,_ he thought. _No matter. Ada should have a laptop somewhere in his room. I hope it's in working condition, though._

TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Elrond and Thranduil walked pasted the room, engaged in a conversation when a loud shouts of "No, no, no!" and furniture being thrown were heard.

Thranduil looked at Elrond in disbelief. "This is Valinor. Surely nothing could happen?"

The half-elf shook his head. "With my sons, anything could happen."

Legolas appeared behind them, carrying a laptop in one hand and a think bundle of papers in the other. "Lord Elrond, you worry heedlessly." He said, grinning.

"What do you mean?"

Legolas tipped his head in the direction of the room. "Why don't you go see for yourself?"

Elrond entered the room, staring at the three of his sons. Aragorn sat with his head down, banging one fist on the desk, mumbling, "No, no, no…" under his breath. Elladan was staring at the computer screen, repeating, "You can't be that mean," and Elrohir was on the verge of breaking his chair.

Elrond cleared his throat. The pairs of eyes looked guiltily at him. "May I ask what are you three doing?" He said, folding his arms and walking forward. Legolas suppressed a smirk.

"Nothing, _Ada_." Aragorn quickly said. The twins nodded in agreement. "We were simply having…a debate. A very energetic debate." Elrohir offered lamely.

Thranduil snorted. "You are not fooling anyone, Elrohir, especially your father." He pointed to the computer. "What are you doing with my son's computer?"

Elrond tapped one foot. "I'm waiting," he quietly said, craning his head. "Show me."

Reluctantly, the three parted, allowing their father to the screen. Elladan nudged his youngest brother. "See how much trouble you got us into!" He hissed.

Aragorn elbowed him back. "You didn't have to read it!" He responded. Aragorn visibly turned a shade of white at the glare Elrond was giving him. "Estel," he began.

The man took a step back, trying to look innocent, but failing. "Yes?"

"Why were you reading this?"

Aragorn fidgeted with the mouse. "Um, because it's…interesting?"

Elrohir made a choking sound. His father looked steadily at him. "And what about you?" The younger twin gestured helplessly. "Because it's fun to see our youngest brother and Legolas getting—"

"Shush!" Aragorn hissed, furiously kicking Elrohir's foot. "Don't you dare say anything!"

Elrohir glared at him. "Would you rather it was a slash story rather than a torture fic?" he pointedly inquired. Aragorn slumped down in his chair, and mumbling something inaudible.

Elladan blurted out, "Valar, Ada, it is only fan fiction!" he did not meet his father's eyes. "None of it happened…I think."

Elrond shook his head. "Eru help me," he said. "I concede!" He was about to leave when a thought struck him. "By the way, who introduced you to this?"

Elladan and Elrohir pointed to Aragorn. The man glared at them. "It was Legolas!" he stated.

All the occupants of the room stared at the said elf. Legolas weakly grinned as Thranduil stepped toward him. The former king of Mirkwood crossed his arms. "What possessed you to begin such a pastime?"

The elf shrugged. "I was bored," he replied casually. "And since I had a computer, I put it to good use."

Thranduil rolled his eyes. Elrond patted him sympathetically on the shoulder.

Legolas grinned at Aragorn. "By the way, what were you shouting about?"

The man gesture to the screen. "That-that site—they kicked the writer off for no reason!" He angrily sputtered. "Now how am I supposed to finish the sequel?"

The elf held up the papers he had been carrying. "I managed to print the story out before the author was kicked off," he said calmly. "So who wants to read it first?"

Aragorn jumped up, and nearly tripped over Elrohir's feet. "Give it to me!" he cried. "I claim the right to read it first!"

Elladan shoved him aside. "No, I claim the right!"

Legolas sighed. "Must you three fight like children?" he asked in exasperation. "Estel asked first, so I'm going to let him read it." He passed the papers to his friend. Aragorn clutched them to his chest, and stuck his tongue out impudently at his brothers before running out of the room.

"Brat," Elladan said under breath.

"The little twerp," muttered Elrohir, looking wistfully at Legolas' laptop. "Surely you don't have another copy of the story?"

Legolas shook his head. "I'm afraid not," he answered. "But I do have another story for you to read."

Thranduil cleared his throat. "What are you doing with my laptop?"

"I thought you said you hated this one!" His son protested. "The one you said was not worth the value of even one scrap of mithril!"

The Silvan elf held out a hand. "Give it to me. As much as I hate it, it still comes in handy at times."

"But, Ada—" Legolas finally handed it over. "Oh very well."

Thranduil stalked out of the room. "Next time, ask me if you could borrow my laptop? Do you hear?"

"I hear you," Legolas muttered. He looked dejectedly at the twins. "I'm not sure if I can still find the story."

"But you have to!" Elladan begged him. "Please?"

"I don't know, Elladan."

"I'll give you my dagger if you show it to me."

Legolas looked at him, interest in his eyes. "You would?" When the younger peredhel nodded, he glanced at Elladan. "What will you give me?"

The half elf thought for a moment. ""I have a book about archery tactics," he offered. "The one you continued to borrow from me and never return."

Legolas sat down in front of the computer. "Very well," He said with a grin. In a few minutes, he found the story. Elladan and Elrohir eagerly sat down next to him, eyes already fixed on the page.

Elrond stared at the three for moment before he finally left the room. "_Hîn natha hîn_." He said softly to himself, shaking his head. He nearly collided with Thranduil in the hallway.

The elf stared at his son despairingly. "I wish I never bought that computer," he said more to himself than Elrond. "It has caused much trouble."

Elrond sighed. "We can be glad they are only reading strange stories, not killing each other like did in the past."

Thranduil idly traced the edge of his laptop. "But I wonder what Elrohir meant by 'slash.'" He mused aloud. "And why do they seem to fear it so much?"

**The End**

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**Translations:**

Mellon nîn – my friend

Ada – dad

Hîn natha hîn – "Children will be children"

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**A/N:** Comments, anyone?

_**Calenlass Greenleaf, Keeper of Legolas' pronunciation of "Aragorn" and the brotherly love between Aragorn and Legolas.**_


End file.
